SPEAKER_04 1:34:30–1:36:15
that just makes it so messy, dude. You want messy? You're dealing with human beings here in a world that we don't understand control. It's easier to believe that at least. Well, it's very ego-satisfying, right? Yeah. But again, it's like that if you can grasp that concept now, it takes a lot of the emotion away from it. You're still going to have those days where you're incredibly frustrated. It's like you're going to take responsibility for the outcome, whether it is or whether it isn't. It might be your fault. It might not be your fault, but a lot of times you just don't know. And again, if you can look at it from a process standpoint, it takes the emotions out of it. And believe me, it's less wear and tear on you. It's early in my career. I make the joke about the scar that I have on my forehead from banging my head on my steering wheel. Every night I used to drive home after work and going, 'man, I'm an idiot. I just don't know what I'm doing.' It's like, 'why can't I help these people? Why isn't everybody getting better?' right? And it's just the reality. It's like, okay, from where I was in that process of my professional evolution, it's like, I did the best that I could under the circumstances. I wasn't intentionally letting people down. I just didn't know enough. I didn't know how to manage the probabilities. I didn't have enough tools in my toolbox. It's like, so you got to think of this as just a total evolution from the perspective of your own development, from your ability to apply, from your ability to make decisions. It's like they can hand you the cookbook, but it doesn't mean that it's gonna matter at all under many circumstances. There's people that you're not gonna be able to help. And there's a lot of people that you will.
clinical uncertaintyprofessional developmentpatient outcomesprocess-oriented thinkingemotional regulation